What I've learned about love through my life experiences.
We often mistake fear for love. We think we are doing something worthy or loving someone for the essence of love when it fact, we love them out of fear. We look to them to protect us from the very things that prohibit the love in our hearts from blossoming. We think there is solace in their embrace when in actuality we are clinging to anything that can save us from our fear. What are we fearful of? I asked myself that many times.
As I sit her listening to Sting sing Fields of Gold, I yearn for the warmth of the sun on my body, for the warmth of love on my lips and in my heart. I realize that fear is actually the opposite of love. If you are fearful of anything, there is no room in your heart for love.
I realize that pure love is the remedy for ridding yourself of fear. One must face their fears, wrap their heads and hearts around that fear and feel it. Actually feel the fear to the core of your being. Feel the pain of past hurts. Embrace yourself in that moment of feeling the fear. When you are able to do that, you will also be able to witness and feel the love. That love will win and take over but you must keep still long enough to envision the possibility that was there all along. Fear just had a hold of you. With your ego in control, your heart was unable to open without acknowledgement.
That is what I was doing as I listened to Sting sing his song. I was envisioning how beautiful it would be to be laying next to the man I love in a field in Bali. Would I lay there afraid the feeling would go away? Would I lay there afraid that one day he will leave me and I'll be all alone? Would I lay there not wanting that moment to end? Or would I be lying there embracing the moment, reveling in the joy and beauty of sharing a moment in time with another soul that I adored? Would I be enjoying the time we had together not contemplating anything of a negative nature? Would I just be enjoying him for the pure beauty of the moment?
Imagine laying in that field of gold in Bali next to someone that you are so exposed to, your heart is gaping open, the fear gone with nothing left but love. In that very moment, what do you do, how do you feel, what do you think?
I have found that love in myself after years of searching inside of me. It is called self love. Now, as I listen, I find myself envisioning the feeling of love radiating from my heart. At one time I would have been lying their so fearful that all I would be thinking about were my insecurities of not thinking I was good enough for him. I'd be contemplating his departure from my life or trying to contemplate what his next move would be. Would he use me for sexual favor or exploit me financially or even worse, suck the very energy and life right out of my body?
As I sit here contemplating life, love and the pursuit of happiness, I'm thinking to myself, if these horrible things did happen, then what? If I were physically harmed, I will heal. If I died, it would just be my physical body dying and has nothing to do with the essence of who I am or my soul's survival. Beyond that, I might get my feelings hurt, right? That would be my ego hurting, not my spirit. The ego operates out of fear, not out of love so in essence if my ego gets bruised, who cares. My ego isn't who I really am.
What I have come to learn is that it is none of my business what other people say or think about me. If they are that shallow and choose to say negative things without really getting to know the person I am, they do not need to reside in my energy of life. My life is beautiful and is filled with magnificent love and beauty. What they say about me is unimportant to me as a soul and as a person living on this planet. It doesn't impact me unless I allow it to do so.
I have chosen to move forward in love and let go of the fear for good. I believe in a loving God, a power much greater than myself. I believe we are here on this planet that I like to call Earth School, to learn. If we can't overcome the fear and learn to continue to move forward always in love, we will have a very difficult time no matter what we do.
We all have done things that we are not very proud of. However, instead of beating ourselves up, we should be saying thank you for the experience and try a little harder to always act in loving, warm, kind, compassionate ways in the future. Opening your heart to the possibility of loving someone for the shear joy of love and not for anything else is what love and life should be all about. No one can save you from the ravages of daily living. That isn't their job. If they aren't loving you the way you want to be loved, then you aren't loving you that way either. You may think you are but take a look again as you might find power in this message.
Look at the mirror image of you; the reflection of the person standing opposite you. Like attracts like, need attracts need. If you don't like the image you are seeing, I think you will be very surprised to learn that when you change you and the way you love, that image will also change. Sometimes that mirror image may go away completely, or it may not be able to change, which is what I think happens in marriages that end in divorce. One person gets stuck and the other grows. The image is no longer compatible.
When images change, don't fight that loss for fear of being alone. Embrace that loss, that change, let it go and see what new reflection mirrors itself to you now. Then, adjust the picture as needed. Fine tune the image, let go of the fear, love from the heart and start living your bliss in your own field of gold.
You can contact me through my normal channels on http://www.avoiceforchange.com/ or send an email message to donna.appel@newmedicinefoundation.com or donna@avoiceforchange.com
Now you know (NYK) to seize the day! Pass it along and be A VOICE FOR CHANGE. There is opportunity around every corner.
Namaste (I bow to you), Donna Appel
